Secret Diaries of a Fangirl

I really hate castles. It's cold and moldy and it stinks inside of them. And they actually charge money so you can see how ruined their empty ruin is. They call it history. I hoped to take a nap in the car by annoucing I've got no money, instead, they paid the fee for my. So I'm tired and walking the ruin while blogging or blogging while walking and freezing. It took them thirty minutes to see three empty rooms and we have to leave this huge shit 30 minutes from now and I'm nervous and tired. And everybody calls me bitchy and spoilsport. Hey I am not having fun, therefore leave me the fuck alone.

I hate my, excuse my French, fucking family. Hate hate hate. I need to change my permanent address before the next elections and pack my all stuff and take off. Another planet will be good.

Also, need new friends. Seriously.

Talking to rapidshare support?

( Read more... )

Ok, the David Tenninch club thing was fun, but now it's an old meme. I guess it is time to let it go and die, few months of inactivity should do it. And then I cannot help but hope that the stupidestfangirlever moves on to another show as she did from J/C (not before embarrassing all the people interested in J/C who had nothing to do with her) and ST and SG...

Anyway, I feel kind of tired of everything and I've been skipping school. Bad bad bad. Because suddenly going there seems kinda pointless. I don't know, it is just too much effort to get up, get dressed, get there and I feel very much like going on empty battery.

I hate winter. All the fruit and vegetable is way too expensive. Weather is cold, I can't sleep, it is dark all the time and what I hate the most are the bloody christmas. The days of rush and shopping. Gah. What's all the fuss about?

Lately I've been wondering about two, well, three important issues:

1/ is English word order applicable to mathematics in order to explain it to students, who have inflective language as the first language

2/ why is the word "boner" so attractive to people

3/ where exactly are J/C fic authors wrong with the dickage
( and the winner is... )

End of today's wisdom.

I couldn't sleep, so I finished reading of "Stranger in a Strange Land" and I don't understand why I haven't read it before. I like the way Heinlein's works make me think. It's liberating, witty way of thinking, and full of sarcasm and self-ridiculing. Live's a big joke. However, since I was eight when I've read "Friday", and I've read it at least ten times since them, it's no wonder I turned out so screwed up.

Well, the bad/good news is that I bought 4 Heinlein's books I haven't read yet at FFS. It's bad, because I should be reading "The Red Badge of Courage" and some more boring novels. Why the more is the book boring, the more probably it is going to become classic? I'm missing my Shakespeare, full of blood, sex and violence. Although, he really seriously lacks in spaceships. Good is that I have something to read that doesn't have to have "Star Trek" or "Doctor Who" in the title to catch my attention. Doctor Who is good, but it's more of a relaxation than of a thinking book. Turn of your brain, chill out, let the Doctor take you on an adventure.

Thinking books, however, aren't always the best idea. Toni Morrison usually makes me doubt the meaning of life. Heinlein makes me think about the insanity of religion, moral and social structure of human society, the whole system. He makes me an anarchistic freethinker in my mind, even when I usually follow the road of established rules and taboos.

I've been wondering how much I was influenced by the books I've been reading as a child. Because somehow the rules for society that I have in my mind, what is and isn't appropriate, seem to be a bit different from the standard. And I'm pretty sure my parents and grandparents didn't teach me that. Maybe they should have watch closely what I was reading. Maybe I should make a list of books unsuitable for children that I've read when I was under ten :D

Seriously, I love House MD. I really do. I think it is probably the most interesting show since The X Files. But... But there is always but in everything. Few months back, the only thing that would set me off were the occasional ship wars and fandom wanks here on LJ.

Then I've found this group of Czech House blogers. Seriously, my view of the fandom changed completely. The fuckers piss me off. They took something brilliant and turned it into series of bad and awkward Huddy fics, which get increasingly worse the more the author thinks they are funny.

Badfics exist. I know. But there is something like spellcheck, there is something like betareaders. I won't even mention the grammar. They don't know even the basics. It's not even fun anymore to mst it. It sucks all my wit out of me and leaves me feeling drained and sick and depressed.
It's not just the fics. They have terribly distorsed pictures which they call fanarts. I don't know, since when is making House's face even longer than it is a piece of art? Have I missed some new fashion?

Then there are these lame attempts at "cool" combination of Czech and English in the titles and menus (Well, it is nice you use the word drabble, but it means exactly 100words, not 89 nor 134, assholes). They, of course, don't know properly either of those languages.

Those things I'd have survived, but then there is this new one, who steals fanarts and screencaps right from the LJ, without credit, linking it directly from the original artists' photobuckets sometimes. Like 1% of her blog's content is really hers. I contacted the latest victim, whose screencaps she links right from her photobucket while having no idea about what episode are they from. In the past some of the others stole my bad jokes caps and removed the text. I told them that all they have to is to ask and I will give them the clean ones. It's all about permission and credit. Would they copy their peer's homework without asking first?

I think it's a shame. If stealing and bad grammar is all they are capable of, what is the future of the fandom. It's a bunch of little fuckers with no sense of humour and no talent for art, vids or writing. They have no sense of self-criticism, they are unable to distinguish between a good collage or wallpaper and piece of shit, they cannot tell the difference between a good story and crap pulled out of someone's ass while they were probably high on sugar and teenage hormones. They have no talent and no sense of politeness. So in the end, the fandom is screwed and I'm seriously pissed off. End of story.

Thanks for reading. I feel much better now.

Ok, why did I think that the internet is going to calm me down. It only put my mind into overload with new promo pics for House. I am full os speculations with nowhere to unload them. Also, I cannot sleep because the new episode won't let me, just like the last week and I haven't slept much yesterday either. And then during/after the episode, I have no one to share the lulz with, since Ziina's ass and the rest of her body are in London. Oh my, will my mind stop whirling the ideas of the season finale in my head? Last time I got tangled in speculations like this was Unimatrix Zero...

So I planned going home for Easter...then I decided that there is no point in doing that and changed plans...

I wanted to go shopping and to gym today.

It is almost 10pm.

I wasn't at gym.

I didn't go shopping either.

Instead of that, I'm still where I was yesterday - collapsed on the carpet in Ziina's living room, clicking between paint shop pro and photoshop and trying to figure out a header for my LJ...

At least I learned to download streamed audio, started using tags and found out that vdownloader 0.7 works with youtube, yay...